For about a week or so I've been meaning to call my Dr.
Obviously, since I waited an entire week I didn't feel like it was that big of a deal, but I finally remembered to do it yesterday.
And they wanted me to come in immediately.
Yesterday I sat in a waiting room while listening to them scramble around, trying to figure out why their computers weren't working. I sat there and worried that this was going to take longer than my allotted hour lunch.
Yesterday they sent me for a sonogram. They were worried that it may be something more. I drove over to the clinic worried what I was going to tell my manager.
I sat there and waited. I sat there and worried. I worried about who was checking my files, whether or not our client needed something and I wasn't there to handle it.
Yesterday I had a Doctor say "We don't know what it is, we need more tests."
I sat there in my gown. And I worried. Only now I wasn't worried about my job and what was or was not happening in my absence. I was worried about my little boy and what would happen if this went from "We don't know..." to "I'm so sorry..." I worried about my husband and what would happen to if this changed our life from happiness to heartbreak. I worried about my family and what would happen if...
Yesterday I did a lot of worrying, a lot of thinking.
Now I'm focused on today.