Toddler Teeth Brushing 101 - I Fail

Ok. I call uncle.

Seriously.

Can someone, anyone, please for the love of all things holy clue me in on how you are supposed to brush a toddlers teeth?

Because right now? It’s not going so well.

There are a couple of reasons that factor in to what I can only call one of the most difficult parts of child rearing that I have ever had to endure to date. It’s very quickly inching out breast feeding and getting my child to sleep through the night on my list of things that SOMEONE should have told me were going to be a pain right in the butt.

But I digress.

It’s not that Keagan doesn’t LIKE getting his teeth brushed. Oh no. He LOVES toothbrushes. He loves toothbrushes so much that I have had to start stockpiling toothbrushes because almost every morning one of ours disappears (and subsequently reappears covered in dust bunnies under the couch a week later). Oh the joys of a child that can reach (and climb up on) the bathroom sink.

No, it’s not his dislike that makes this simple act so frustratingly difficult.

What makes brushing his teeth so difficult is the fact that he wants to do it himself. Always. Don’t even THINK about taking his toothbrush away from him or worse yet, did you REALLY think you were going to take that toothbrush out and not give it to him?

The toothbrush comes out. His eyes light up like it’s Christmas. And then the grabbing starts. And the whining. Oh the whining.

So really. How am I supposed to do this? Duct tape him into the highchair? Hold him down ala professional wrestling and have Randy move in for the kill? What? Help me.


Because at this rate? We’ll be fitting him for dentures and Mommy will be in the loony bin.