Monday, February 16, 2009

Is There No Shame?

In my 37 weeks of pregnancy I have learned that when people see a pregnant woman, all rational, filtered thought goes out the window.

What are you left with? I'll tell you what.

You're left with an overly hormonal, already on the edge of going postal pregnant woman that is left in tears or better yet, off in search of a high velocity fire arm to take aim at the offenders.

Below please find a list compiled from personal experience and from the lovely ladies on the interwebs that were so kind to share their horrendous and insulting experiences with me.

This list is not all inclusive. Sadly, there are many more and probably many worse things that uneducated and down right rude people have said to those that are pregnant. It does show however, and quite impressively, just how the filter goes bye bye when non-pregnant people are speaking to the pregnant.

* WOW, that's a big belly you have there.
* You look SO tired.
* Are you sure you aren't having twins/triplets/octuplets?
* Wow...How are you even walking right now?
* Are you SURE you're pregnant?
* You obviously aren't eating enough/getting enough nutrients/taking care of yourself.
* Your Ass has gotten really big. (Note, referring to any pregnant womens ass is not good. You've been warned.)
* You look like you could go any day now! (this is especially rude when said woman is still in her 1st/2nd trimester.)
* How's our little FAT girl doing?
* Are you still with the father?
* So, are you just laying there getting fat? (this was said to a bed rest mother to be. Come on people. Seriously?)
* Don't worry, your nose/skin/ass/etc. will go back to normal after the baby.
* You're eating again?
* Whoa, you are a knocked-up-a-saurus! (Seriously?)
* You are screwed, this kid is going to come out and be ready for kindergarten!
* Aw, your poor little face is SO swollen!
* Wow, you are HUGE. I mean, just ENORMOUS!
* Oink, Oink, Oink (this was said to a woman by a co-worker while eating lunch ::throatpunch::)
* I only gained 6 pounds with both my pregnancies & your sister in law never gained more than 9 pounds with all 4 of hers. By the looks of you, you've already got us both beat. (Note: Comparing your pregnancy to any other pregnant womans is assinine. Especially if it was 30+ years ago.)
* Oh, you're getting the beached whale look already.

*Please note: If you have been the offender of such comment, watch your back. We may not be able to run right now, but a high powered waddle with a sharp object can be just as effective.

**Please also note: A pregnant belly does NOT give you free reign to touch said belly? Do you go up to non-pregnant people and start feeling them up? I think not.

***Please lastly note: Unless you are our Dr. keep your Pregnancy Police comments regarding weight gain, foods, beverages, activities to yourself. It's none of your business if I have a latte. Or chocolate. Or anything else for that matter. Back off.

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